Day 11: My report card, bar fights, and the Dalai Lama

Age 12, in trouble. In my report card, one of my teachers wrote that I talked too much.

All these years later, I don’t remember what that was all about, what I was saying in class. But since I don’t recall, here are some possible topics.

Maybe I was discussing deep philosophical issues with the other students, such as the topic of free will. Do we have true free will? Or are were really more like robots, programmed by our past, so that our actions really don’t belong to us?

Maybe I talked about how space and time aren’t separate, but in physics, there’s the concept of space-time. And how a planet can curve the space around it.

Maybe I talked about the risks of big deficit spending by our government, and how the increasing national debt would eventually endanger our nation.

Since I can’t recall, I can make up any story. Heck, even if I do recall, I can still make up any story. After that report card, I never had another report card that said I talked too much.

Before that report card, I hadn’t fully expressed myself. My voice wasn’t free. And after the report card, I still wasn’t free. Not the card’s fault.

I didn’t know how to fully express myself, to truly be myself, because I was still figuring out who I was and how to be at age 12. Even as an adult, I bottled many emotions inside. I didn’t always “speak my truth.”

Fortunately, I eventually did get in better touch with my emotions. As I connected more deeply with myself, I noticed that I connected more easily with others, including clients. And this helped my clients to create deeper changes.

Who knew that becoming more comfortable in my own skin would improve my life dramatically? Many clients report the same thing; as they do the deep work, as they become more comfortable in their own skin, they solve the current issue and get other big life improvements.

And sometimes it starts with a small step. I’ll share a snippet of an idea, not original to me.

I’ll call it Quick Transition Breathing, or QTB. You take a deep breath in between activities… in transition… in the moment between things.

Let’s say I finish typing a sentence, and I stand up. I’ve just transitioned from typing to standing. So, I take a deep breath before I go onto the next activity.

Then I walk to the sink for a glass of water. Again, a transition moment before I fill my glass. So, I take a deep breath. I fill my glass with water. Again, a transition moment before I drink it. So, I take a deep breath.

This could take a few hours to fully grasp, but in a few moments you got the quick version.

Here are a few of my students talking about practicing QTB and what happened next.

Dalai Lama
– “Before I learned QTB from William, I was always getting into bar fights. Now, I just chill, flying around the world with my homies spreading the word of peace.”
– “Oh, about William getting in trouble for talking too much. My bad. When we were both 12, I was a bit chatty with him in class. Sorry, William.”

Elon Musk
– “After practicing QTB, I felt inspired to join the board of Tesla, became CEO, founded SpaceX and The Boring Company. And I saved 17.5 people from a stampede at Walmart on Christmas. Technically, I guess 17 people.”
– “And I founded a frozen yogurt place called, ‘You Musk Eat This.’ When you eat it, your body exhales oxygen rather than carbon dioxide. Enjoy my froyo, and save the planet.”
– “And since I had too much free time on my hands, I’m building a time machine. I just need to find a flux capacitor and break the laws of physics. No biggie.”

Abraham Lincoln (during his lawyer days, not his presidency)
– “Before I learned QTB from William, I was always worried about going to court when my client had a weak case. After BTB, I created way better legal arguments.”
– “I must confess, I almost didn’t try QTB based on doing a Google search. Lesson learned: I can’t always trust what’s on the Internet.”

Brad Pitt (from a voicemail)
– “Hey William. I’m calling your cell, because Holly’s not returning my calls. Would you tell your wife to call me? I’m single, now. It’s Brad. Brad Pitt. Thanks, buddy.”

… … …

As I’ve gotten more comfortable being me, my ability to laugh at life, and myself, has increased. Joking around has become more natural.

And I use humor as a therapeutic tool with clients. When a client’s laughing, it helps reduce the power of their problem. Weaving humor into a hypnotic story? Bueno, tres bien, and great.

Dear reader, what did you get from today’s posting? Too strange? Not strange enough?

And for the more astute reader, yes, I did recycle a joke about Brad Pitt from an earlier post in the 21-day series. If you’re wondering if there’s any reason I mentioned him twice, well, you should ask my wife about that. Now excuse me, I have a lunch with a woman named Angelina.