Have you been avoiding a task? Here’s a way to get started on it.
Skin Breathing Technique
1. Think of the task you’ve been avoiding but want to do right now.
2. Set a timer for two minutes. (Later you can adjust the duration.)
3. Close your eyes.
4. Do three cycles of gentle yet deeper breathing, inhaling through the nose and out the mouth.
5. Imagine doing the task you’ve been avoiding, and notice the emotion associated with the task you’ve been avoiding.
6. Notice where the emotion is in your body.
7. Speaking out loud, briefly describe your experience using the simple template.
- Template: “I feel [emotion]. And I feel it in [body location].”
- Ex. I feel scared. And I feel it in my throat.
- Ex. I feel anxious. And I feel it in my stomach.
- Ex. I feel confused. And I feel some heat on my forehead.
8. Continue the gentle, yet deeper, breathing as you pretend that you can inhale oxygen into the body location… and exhale any negative emotion through the mouth so what you exhaled becomes nothingness.
- Ex. If you feel anxious and feel it in your stomach, then you would pretend to inhale oxygen through the stomach.
- Simply pretend even though we both know that you’re inhaling through your nose.
9. Repeat step 8 until the timer beeps.
10. Check in with yourself.
If you feel uncomfortable, reset the timer, and do the skin breathing again, perhaps for a longer duration.
If you feel relaxed enough to do the task, then reset the timer for the same duration you did the skin breathing. Ex. If the breathing was two minutes, the task is now two minutes.
See the notes below for more important details.
Notes
Using this technique helps you to relax, and that emotional state makes it easier to start your task. If you set the breathing timer for two minutes, then set the task timer for two minutes. If you set the breathing timer for five minutes, then set the task timer for five minutes.
Once the timer beeps for the task, check in with yourself to “get permission” to go to the next duration round of action.
Q. “William, I set the skin breathing timer for two minutes. But I still felt scared. What now?”
Reset the timer for a bit longer, perhaps three minutes. Experimenting with how long to set the timer is part of the process. There is no one duration-fits-all solution. Two minutes was simply a starting point for the experiment. Keep doing skin breathing until you feel relaxed enough to take action.
Q. “William, why set a timer for doing the task? I don’t know how long the task will take.”
It’s okay to not know the duration of a task. Start by setting your task timer with the same duration as the skin breathing, so two minutes as an example.
When we use a timer with a short duration, say two minutes, then our subconscious will often think, “Two minutes? I can do this task for two minutes.”
After the task timer beeps, check in with your subconscious mind. Ask, “How was that?” If it feels good (or at least fine), then ask, “What’s the next duration?”
If your subconscious says two minutes, then set it for two minutes. If it says five minutes, then set it for five minutes. If it says a really big jump in duration, then say, “Let’s go a little slower… no need to rush it…”
It’s better to increase durations in smaller chunks, at least when you’re just learning the process. Sometimes the subconscious mind can try to skip ahead.
Q. “William, how many task timer rounds should I do?”
Rinse and repeat until the task is done, or your subconscious wants to take a break, or you feel you’ve done enough for today.
These short durations build momentum, helping you get past that initial “I don’t want to do it” feeling.
My productivity students have been surprised by the power of short durations. As you get good at this technique, you can greatly increase your initial task duration versus the initial skin breathing duration… or perhaps you’ll rarely need to use skin breathing…
Some of my productivity students don’t use this technique any longer, and they set their timer for 25 minutes as the first task duration. They worked up to that longer first task round. Be patient, and work up to the longer initial duration.
Open-ended task vs small duration task… it matters to your friend
An open-ended task can feel uncomfortable for the subconscious mind. If you say, “I don’t know how long this task will take. I’ll just keep going,” it can make your subconscious cringe.
But if you say, “I don’t know how long this task will take. Subconscious, how about starting for two minutes? Then we’ll see how it goes,” then it will feel included rather than excluded. Don’t exclude your friend.
Your subconscious may appreciate the small duration task more than you’d expect. And it appreciates you checking in with it after the short duration is over.
It’s nice to give your subconscious what it needs. Your subconscious mind has a lot of power. Treat your subconscious with respect, and it’ll be more likely to use that power in ways that make your life happier.