Part 1: To accelerate progress, build a better relationship with yourself

Let’s say that you learned self-hypnosis from a book or video. You’re feeling pretty relaxed each day, but nothing’s changing. The issue remains, and you’re thinking, “Hey, I thought self-hypnosis was supposed to help me solve my problem. What’s going on?”

Self-hypnosis can help, but it depends upon what type of self-hypnosis you’re doing. If you’re doing the relaxing type of self-hypnosis, that’s a good start. But many of us need a more powerful hypnotherapy tool after we’re relaxed.

The technique below is stage one of a powerful tool. It has various names from the hypnosis and NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) worlds, but I call it the Parts Technique, and I’ll share stage one of the technique.

The technique is really just a daily chat with your subconscious mind. In stage one, you’re building a relationship with your subconscious mind (SCM). You’ll speak with your SCM in an encouraging way as if talking to a good friend.

Let’s say that you’re using hypnosis to stop smoking or lose weight. If you get tempted to smoke or you eat something you regret eating, or have any type of setback, you could say, “Hey subconscious, it’s okay. We’ll get through this. This is just a temporary setback during our journey together.”

Say something like this whenever there’s a setback, though you may even want to shift the language at some point. Perhaps call it a bump in the road when that feels appropriate. Your language may shift over time. You’d simply be supportive with your subconscious in the moment it needs your support. Be a good friend.

Now onto the main technique.

Parts Technique (stage one)

To make this even more powerful, have a brief two-minute conversation. At first, try to limit it to two minutes. After a week or two, it’s okay to go longer. But at first keep it brief. This daily conversation will accelerate your progress in surprising ways.

This is like having a friendly conversation with a good friend. You say hello, how are you, and then listen to what your friend has to say. Sometimes you’ll ask follow-up questions. And you simply listen without judgment, without giving advice, without an agenda. You’re simply listening in a kind and gentle way.

1. Enter hypnosis.
– Do your favorite self-hypnosis technique (e.g., Countdown Technique, or simply deep breathing for a couple of minutes) to enter a relaxed state.

2. Ask open-ended questions to gather information; at stage one, do not ask the SCM to do something; your role at this stage is simply to gather information and then write that in your  journal.

Here’s an example with Jane and her subconscious mind (SCM).

Jane: Hi subconscious mind, how are you today?
SCM: I’m alright.

Jane: I’m glad. Is there anything that’s on your mind today?
SCM: I’m thinking about the Smith project that’s due soon.

Jane: Tell me more about that.
SCM: One approach is to modify the main office’s layout, but another approach is to modify the workflow between teams… I think that…

Jane: Is there anything else on your mind?
SCM: I think that’s it for now.

Jane: Okay. Thanks for sharing. And I’m glad that we’re talking with each other each day. We’re on this journey together, and I just want you to know that we’re a team.
SCM: I feel safer knowing that. Thanks.

Jane: You’re welcome. And I’ll talk to you later.

At the end, drink some water and walk around for a couple of minutes to come out of hypnosis. You’re building a relationship with the SCM, so that it knows it can count on you for support. As the relationship gets stronger, it becomes easier to create changes, because your subconscious mind trusts you.

Soon I’ll post something about the the next step, Parts Technique (stage two). At stage two, you’ll build upon the work done in stage one, and you’ll be able to create changes at a much faster pace.

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